Archive for August, 2008

Aug
31

Taking Risks…

Posted by: xian | Comments (0)

I refer to the Kabbalah Center’s Daily Tune-Ups quite often, and today’s Weekly Tune-Up once again drives it home. Maybe we can all try this in the upcoming week: taking risks. Do something you’ve been afraid to do and see what the outcome is.Xtina, I always think of you, when you took a risk and opened your own studio: Be Studios. I see you’re re-launching your website, because you know I would have included your link here. ;-) But feel free to comment back on the post, and include your mission statement. Ladies, you must check out her studio in Lakwood, right on Clifton!

But we must remember to utilize Faith (and you don’t have to be religious to find Faith). If we want to taste the sweetness of life, and experience our every desire, we need to step outside of our circle; or comfort zone.Take a close look at Yehuda Berg’s second point: the world of cause & effect, with time creating the space between action and reaction. I especially need to repeat the following: And remember to learn patience in order to allow the Light to do its magic.

It’s been a risky week for those of you who’ve been following the risk-taking assignments in the dailies. Thank you for writing to me about your victories, and even your failures. (If you are not on the list, make sure to join so you can participate.)

‘Ask for It’, Tuesday’s exercise, led some students to be disappointed because they didn’t get what they asked for. This brings up two important points I’d like to share with you.

1. Staying Open

These risk exercises are about opening up. To one degree or another, we are all blocked. Kabbalistically, we are surrounded by klipah (metaphysical barriers) that prevent our Light from fully shining. Every time we go for something that terrifies us, we create cracks in the barrier. The Light is always there, we need only to sweat a little to make an opening for it to come in.

This takes courage and the willingness to fall flat on our face. And to keep falling until we are able to stand up. It’s no coincidence that I read a great Japanese proverb this week, fall seven times, get up eight.

So what if you got turned down? Keep risking. Every no brings you closer to a yes.

2. Time is Your Friend

We live in a world of cause and effect, with time creating space between action and reaction. That’s why the Light rarely comes in the moment we do something, positive or negative.

From a kabbalistic perspective, time is mercy. Imagine if we felt the effects of our negative actions the moment we did them. It wouldn’t be pleasant. And the rare times we do feel the effects on the spot, well, that’s what we call a time of judgment. But we don’t want that instantaneous cause and effect in our lives. We want the time to do right and correct our actions.

But we can’t have it both ways. So, if your positive efforts haven’t yet come back to you, know that they will, in time. And remember to learn patience in order to allow the Light to do its magic.

Be careful not to fall into the gap. I can’t tell you how many people I’ve known over the years who were so close, yet gave up because they didn’t see results in the time frame they expected.

This week, keep doing the exercises. Even forward to friends who’d like to get involved. And remember, the greater the risk, the greater reward – eventually.

Read more and receive the Tune-Ups…

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Aug
30

The Soul Of Beings Is Their Scent…

Posted by: xian | Comments (0)

I watched Perfume: The Story of a Murderer last night. My friend and I (shhh, can’t say her name), went and saw it at the theaters when it first came out. I love this film! It’s actually a great love story; capturing the essence of woman in 18th-century Europe. There was a line in the film that I love: the soul of beings is their scent. It’s so true. One of the best things of being in love is your partner’s scent. It’s a great story with sensuality, desire and greed.  See this film!

And have a great holiday weekend, incer’s! I’m craving a Bloody Mary, that’s my mission today. Along with the West Side Market; yummy!

Categories : Films/Tube
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Aug
28

I’ve Got You Under My Skin….

Posted by: xian | Comments (0)

I had my overnight visit last night. And I’ll admit it, I couldn’t say no. I’m strong, but when you’ve got somebody that’s ready to open their heart and give you a little of what you need, there’s no other option. We had dinner and talked awhile, came home and talked some more. It was nice to set my alarm for someone else. Is this what all the fuss is about? When you love someone and they’re a part of the little things? It’s pretty cool.

The best part is feeling their arms around you. He makes me feel so safe. It could be his many Tattoos, his huge truck (get yo’ mind out the gutter!), but all of my worries seem to disappear; and I don’t go searching for them when I’m with him. Most of my friends know I can be anxiety ridden, and it takes a lot for me to calm down, especially when I’m approaching challenges, but none of it matters when he’s here. I made a few Xian digs at him, I just couldn’t resist. One was, “OK, so you’re here in my life now, are you going to run away”? He looked at me and said; as long as I’m here with you, I’ll be fine. Bitch, good one!

It was nice to go back to bed after he left at 5:30. Gotta love those Leo’s, they have some serious drive. Leo + Scorpio = Fire & Water. Make some sense now? Anyway, after he left I grabbed on to his pillow, and his smell was all over it. I slept for another 3 hours. I love vacation. It’s the first time I’ve been able to really relax when I take some days off at my beautiful house – my fortress. Which brings me to another celebration; today is the one year anniversary at my house. If you want to bring a bottle of champagne over, just give me a holla! ;-)

‘…When I get lost in Space, I can return to this place, ‘cuz you’re the one….’

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Aug
27

Out of the frying pan into the Fire…

Posted by: xian | Comments (0)

Just when I thought it was safe. I got a phone call last night and he was crying to a point where I had to stop and think about how I was going to deal with this. I’m not going to disregard anybody that feels something to the point where it brings them to tears. I had to hear him out. It’s funny, you tend to forget how Love can be a Spell. For the most part, it was an hour of him telling me how he feels, and how his heart got here in the first place. After hearing him out, I told him I’m not going to sit idly by, while he repairs the damages. We all have our baggage, but there comes a point where you can’t use it as an excuse anymore. We have to move forward and allow the positive in. We’ve all had our hearts broken, but what happened to the learning from our mistakes and being honest?  The more we go through these heartbreaks, we see a clearer picture of what it is we really want out of a relationship.

After 4 years of being single,  I get to sort through this craziness. But what’s the saying; if it’s bitter at the start, than it’s sweeter in the end? I do believe that. So, he asked if he could stay over tonight, and I told him I needed to think about it. Damn, here comes another challenge. And here comes my mantra: step outside your circle Xian….

PS: Happy, happy B-day Topher, my favorite Virgo!! :-)

“…And I can’t stand you, most everything you do. Can I not like you for awhile?  No. But, you won’t let me. You won’t set me go. But, I hate it. You know exactly what to do, so that I can’t stay mad at you for too long, that’s wrong. But I hate it, you know exactly how to touch. I despise that I adore you. I hate how I love you so. I love you beyond the reason why….”

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