… before I start this “xian moment”, I want it to be known how incredibly grateful I am for the blessings in my life: my health; a great career – which we know isn’t to be taken for granted these days; a beautiful home – that I bought myself; and a brilliant group of friends. But, yes … here’s the but … I’m feeling *stuck* at the moment. Brace yourself, I’m about to rant a little.

I come from very humble beginnings – my parents didn’t have  much money lying around to truly support a child growing up, so I started working as a bag boy when I was sixteen. I made it my goal to create a name for myself – to go after what I wanted in life and never look back. I did it, I left home at eighteen and started the incYourself journey. I skipped the college part and dove right in. No one could break my focus. I spent years learning about the advertising and marketing industry. I made it my life. I was fascinated with Brands – and even more thrilled that you could create your very own. I found my in, I met a man that worked at a rock magazine here in Cleveland. It would be my college. I spent ten years there, starting as the data entry clerk in charge of entering their reader surveys. It was a part-time position but I knew right away I wanted to work there. I had to sell myself. I finished entering the surveys before the deadline and decided to inquire about a full-time position. They hired me on as merchandising manager; in charge of  the mags merchandise (t-shirts and back issues) and managing subscriber orders. I was in the position for about two years and I started to grow restless.  I really wanted to be in sales so I approached the publisher and asked him if I could run their classified section. It was my first taste of sales and I loved it. We were hitting our numbers and the classified section started to grow. I was promoted to ad exec- selling display ads to non-endemic advertisers (clients that aren’t “in” the same category/industry as your brand.) I also found my mentor  -  the advertising director. She taught me everything: what defines a brand, tailoring the brand’s message, writing strong proposals, developing a media kit, she gave me my confidence as a salesman.  I landed some reputable clients for the mag – there are two I’m especially proud of:  CK Jeans and Levi’s. I loved working with agencies – such creative energy. The ad director eventually left the magazine and the publisher asked me to step in. I remember the feeling when I got the promotion: ” I did it, and this is only the beginning!”  I occupied the position for about four years and decided it was time to see what the corporate world had to offer. It will be eight years – this Thursday -  since I made that decision and so much has changed in publishing since then. Actually, so much has changed over the past eighteen years since I’ve been in the industry. I’m particularly fascinated with its progression into the digital age. I never would have thought we’d ask the forbidden question: “will users pay for content?” So much ahead for the publishing world and I think it’s exciting!

I’ve also been looking at my own progression and there’s a thought that comes to mind: am I really starting to question my focus – what has always pushed me ahead? Perhaps this is what they call a crossroads moment? I loathe “questioning” myself, but right now I see the journey and can’t help but wonder if the things I worked so hard for are in reality what’s holding me back. I know, this is one loaded post and I apologize for laying out my CV … my career has been heavy on my mind these days. But do you know where I’m coming from? Have you ever stopped for a moment to look at your career and ask yourself how you really got there? Or, perhaps I just need a vacation?! In any case, thank you for listening … again. XOs …